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hd4tools
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PostPosted: Thu May 05, 2011 1:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Santa isn't the only one who sees you sleeping...
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Da Beest
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PostPosted: Fri May 06, 2011 5:25 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

The saddest moment for a child is not when he learns Santa Claus isn't real, it's when he learns Chuck Norris is.
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hd4tools
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PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 12:49 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
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Da Beest
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PostPosted: Tue May 10, 2011 5:10 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
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hd4tools
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PostPosted: Tue May 10, 2011 2:07 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Chuck Norris can dribble a bowling ball.
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Da Beest
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PostPosted: Wed May 11, 2011 5:27 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Chuck Norris once bowled a 300. With a tennis ball.
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hd4tools
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PostPosted: Wed May 11, 2011 2:05 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Chuck Norris can make snow angels on a concrete slab.
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Da Beest
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PostPosted: Thu May 12, 2011 5:34 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Chuck Norris is the only person that can punch a cyclops between the eye.
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hd4tools
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PostPosted: Thu May 12, 2011 2:11 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Chuck Norris won a staring contest with Medusa. Only this time, Medusa got turned into stone.
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hd4tools
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PostPosted: Fri May 13, 2011 1:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Chuck Norris' sweat is a biochemical weapon
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Da Beest
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PostPosted: Mon May 16, 2011 5:36 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

If you spell Chuck Norris wrong on Google it doesn't say, "Did you mean Chuck Norris?" It simply replies, "Run while you still have the chance."
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hd4tools
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PostPosted: Mon May 16, 2011 1:41 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

There is no CTRL key on Chuck Norris' keyboard cause Chuck Norris is always in control.
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Da Beest
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PostPosted: Tue May 17, 2011 5:39 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

If it looks like chicken, tastes like chicken, and feels like chicken but Chuck Norris says its beef, then it's f#*%king beef.
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Da Beest
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PostPosted: Wed May 18, 2011 5:38 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Superman owns a pair of Chuck Norris pajamas.
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hd4tools
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PostPosted: Wed May 18, 2011 2:09 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Before they met Chuck Norris, the Black Eyed Peas were simply known as "The Peas."
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